Stephen Merchant, a singing chef and forging creative space.
Image courtesy of Wikimedia.
I recently watched
an interview with Stephen Merchant on Seth Meyers' show, where he shared a
fascinating story about how he encouraged his writers to come up with insults
directed at him. This exercise, while humorous, was also a deliberate attempt
to create a psychologically safe environment—one where his team felt
comfortable enough to express themselves freely, even if it meant poking fun at
him. The clip can be found online if you search for "Stephen Merchant Seth
Meyers insults." or here https://www.tiktok.com/@latenightseth/video/7377777653098482987
Around the same time, I attended a wedding where I witnessed something similar. Guests at the reception felt uninhibited enough to pick up their napkins and spin them in the air while singing, prompted by a singing chef who had clearly made it safe for them to engage in such a playful act (yes even I did it). This seemingly small moment struck me as an example of how a leader can create an atmosphere where people feel free to express themselves, even in ways that might normally feel out of place.
These two
experiences made me reflect on a question central to my current studies of
fear, silence, and psychological safety in leadership: How do you empower
people or create conditions where they feel safe enough to grant you permission
to lead them into what might otherwise be perceived as unsafe territory?
Furthermore, how do you enable them to give themselves permission to innovate,
take risks, or challenge the status quo or to break unwritten social rules?
It seems to me that this involves a complex interplay of intrapersonal, interpersonal, cultural, and structural dynamics. Leaders must navigate and influence these layers, taking into account:
- Intrapersonal dynamics: The internal barriers and permissions individuals impose on themselves based on their unique personality and personal history.
- Interpersonal dynamics: The behavioural norms that are established that govern interactions between people.
- Cultural dynamics: The broader organizational culture that shapes what is considered acceptable behaviour and is encouraged or discouraged.
- Structural dynamics:
The structures, processes, systems, and hierarchies that either constrain
or enable certain behaviours.
Fans of Ken Wilber will see I have borrowed the AQAL model above which can be a useful way of looking at a system.
Interestingly, in both the examples of Stephen Merchant and the singing chef, a bold move on their part—disinhibiting themselves and pushing past their own fear responses—seemed to play a crucial role in creating these conditions. By demonstrating or modelling vulnerability and a willingness to step into discomfort, they were able to influence the group dynamics and foster an environment where others felt safe to do the same.
This raises important considerations for leadership: How can leaders effectively model the behaviours they wish to see in others? And how can they cultivate a culture where psychological safety is not just an ideal but a lived reality that empowers innovation and risk-taking? In my personal experience this is often still a challenge. Self-inhibition and impression management is still a regular occurrence (and is likely to stay that way) so leaders need to know when to make conscious, mindful efforts to disinhibit the part of themselves that restricts play-like behaviour so as to invigorate the atmosphere for learning, creative contribution and creative generosity. They also need to inhibit the tendency to punish, with their words but also with their eyes and other body language. As the Gottmans ( John and Julie that is) might say use “turning towards” behaviour and reduce “turning away from” but aso have good useful and well facilitated brainstorming rules.
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